Tag Archives: relationships

8 things to get used to after a break up

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I’m sure many of us have been through break ups and it’s always a massive change when that person is all of a sudden gone from your life. All break ups are different and I’m sure there’s much more than 8 things to get used to, but here’s a few I have:

  • Not receiving messages from them – whether it’s texts, Facebook messages, Snpachats we have to get used to looking at our phone and not seeing or waiting for a message/reply from them. You seem to slip back into that “I don’t need my phone, no one texts me anyway” kind of phase (even if people do, it doesn’t count in our heads)
  • Not having someone to talk to about your day/ eventsMaybe it’s just me, but when something funny/anger invoking/interesting etc. happened during my day I always used to think ‘Oh I must tell ___ about this’ so when you break up with your partner that person you could rant to is no longer there…guess I better give someone else a call..
  • Waking up aloneProbably one of the worst things to get used to. Waking up in the middle of the night and not having someone to snuggle up closer to whilst we’re half asleep sucks.
  • Having much more free time – Having free time has never been seen as a bad thing, but it’s the kind of free time you don’t want, the twiddling-of-the-thumbs, what-to-do-with-my-life-now kind of free time, especially if you use that free time to think about how much you miss them.
  • Lack of intimacy – Let’s just say we miss cuddles.
  • Having to stop talking about them – As a relationship progresses you find your boyfriend/girlfriend’s name creeping their way into a lot of your sentences/anecdotes, so break ups result in you having to bite your lip when you remember that time when *insert funny story triggered by happening events/conversations*
  • Thinking about things to do together – An advert for a beach day out comes on the t.v. instead of thinking ‘Ooh ____ and I could do that together’ you get used to thinking ‘Yeah, maybe me and a few friends will get round to doing that at some point’…
  • Not knowing what they’re doing with their days – Also a tricky one – mainly for those who were dumped rather than a mutual breakup. You end up torturing yourself with things that they could be doing (or a better word to use: who they might be doing)

Relationships and Social Media

I can’t help but feel that social networking sites/apps, e.g Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram, are becoming more and more harmful in many ways, one of these ways being the effect it has on relationships.

If a couple have these social networking apps – which a majority do – I believe they can cause more problems and stresses to a relationship. I have multiple times heard girls say such things as “he liked another girls photo [on Facebook]” referring to their boyfriends or male interests and sentences like these sound so trivial, and maybe they are, however I’m sure such things can spark all sorts of paranoia for those in a relationship.

It’s a well known fact that social media users ‘stalk’ others on the sites (if you deny this, there’s a 98% chance you’re lying) and I’m pretty sure the majority do this to their other half. We concern ourselves with who’s photos they’ve ‘liked’, which tweets they’ve favourited, who they now follow on Instagram, why they’re on Facebook but haven’t answered your text etc. I even know of people who have mentioned twitter in arguments!

There’s a chance that what I have discussed above is majorly down to a persons paranoia or insecurities, or if a person feels this way about social media and their partner then maybe the relationship is not a healthy one. However, I do think that our ever increasing obsession with social networking is becoming too intrusive in some relationships, even if that just includes a persons fixation with their phone and being generally unsociable, and I do fear for the future of relationships and can’t help but feel this is only the beginning for relationships tiffs caused by social media.